I Want My Ex Girlfriend Back – 5 Mind Games Guaranteed To Get Her Angry

Published: 15th January 2010
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I hear your "I want my ex girlfriend back." And you may really want her back. But are your behaviors toward her matching up? Are you sabotaging your efforts to get her back by dissing, manipulating, or lying to her? Now you may be angry at her; you may even have good reason to be angry. But you'd better get a clear look at the big picture here, otherwise you may find yourself with two arms and nobody in them. Let's chill and take a detailed look.

1. Talking about her behind her back. I dare you to try this one. I guarantee that everyone you talk to will make it a point to let her know. Now if you're just blowing off steam with people who don't know her, that's one thing. It's not so nice, but it's not nearly as bad as dissing her with folks who know her. If you think that trying to get others on your side will help your situation, I urge you to think again. This kind of behavior means you are still in the "fight" stage and you need to find a different frame of mind before you are ready to win her back.

2. Lying to her, and then lying about the lying. Lying is the worst thing you can do to sabotage your efforts to get her back. But layering your lies like you're icing a cake? Come on! You tell a lie, then later claim it was something else, then you go back to your old story. OMG! I'm gonna come over there and slap you! How could she possible trust you? And how can a relationship move forward based on lie layering? Your efforts to get her back will crumble if you don't STOP lying.

3. Pushing her hot buttons in order to manipulate her. We like to fool ourselves that what we do and say is necessary. She made me say it. She was asking for it. Think about this, buster. If you know she hates being called a bitch, then why did you do it? To get her to react. To get her to do something, anything to notice you. This is called button-pushing, and it's an evil habit. We all know, maybe just unconsciously, that by pushing people's buttons, we can emotionally manipulate them, either just to hurt them, or to get them to do what we want. This behavior is almost as low down as lying. If you say "I really want my ex girlfriend back," and yet you're still pushing her buttons, then you don't really want her back, you just want to punish her. Sounds harsh, but better I tell you the truth than you wondering what you're doing wrong.

4. Pretending you're seeing someone else. Trying to make her jealous is a high school game. So if you're still in high school, have at it, but know it won't get you jack. You may be actually seeing someone else. You may be just saying you are. (OMG, another lie!) Either way, you are trying to manipulate her. You may think that making her angry and hurting her feelings is gonna help, but I won't beat around the bush here. You are dead wrong.

5. Twisting her words. I think most of us have experienced this one. Our words get twisted to make us seem wrong or bad. This emotional manipulation keeps us on the hook. People who do this want to control us. If you are doing this, I guarantee she will want to squiggle out from under your thumb. What's that you say? She did? Ah. Don't let others do this to you, and don't do it to others. Play nice.

If you think about it, these five behaviors are probably some of the reasons why you broke up in the first place. These behaviors have nothing to do with love; they are all about cruelty, hatred, and fear. If you really want her back, there are better ways. Positive ways. Ways that will acknowledge you both for the fabulous people you are.

"Okay, I have an ugly past," you think, "but I still really want my ex girlfriend back." You can leave the past behind. It does not have to affect your future. Find your hope and find a step-by-step action plan at http://www.relationshipteam.com.


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